The Charlie Colby Father Files
by SpookyClaire
Summary: A variety of one-shots about Fatherly!Charlie and Fatherly!Colby. The two are married and have two adopted kids, Caroline and Carl. Charlie/Colby. Their ages vary from story to story. Rating just incase. Latest Chapter: Mother's Day
1. Chapter 1: First Day

**The Charlie-Colby Father Files**

**Summery**: A variety of one-shots about Fatherly!Charlie and Fatherly!Colby. The two are married and have two adopted kids, Caroline and Carl. Their ages vary from story to story. Charlie/Colby. Enjoy!

This first story is the day Colby and Charlie go to take Caroline and Carl home.

**Please note**, I know nothing of adoption. So I just wrote what I thought made sense…

--

"Breathe, Charlie." Colby said lovingly, reaching over and placing his hand on his husband's knee.

Charlie turned and smiled. "I know, I k-keep forgetting to do that. I just—I can't believe that the day finally came. I-I mean, after all the months of paper work and 2-hour meetings I just…I came to think it would n-never happen."

"Don't be so nervous." Colby soothed, knowing that whenever his husband stuttered he was nervous or upset. Squeezing Charlie's knee reassuringly he looked back to the road and returned his hand to the steering wheel.

"I—I'm _so_ ha-happy to finally have the day come, Colb. You know that. It's just…" He hung his head "What if they don't l-like living with us? What if they don't like _us_?"

Colby smiled lovingly. "They _love_ us, Charlie. Every time we went to meet with them they begged us not to go!"

"Y-yes, but, what if they only loved the i-idea of being out of that place? And w-when they come home with us they actually fin-find out they hate us?" He turned to his husband "Are you _sure_ they want to go with us??"

"I'm positive." Colby answered the question for the twentieth time in the past hour. Pulling into the parking spot in front of the orphanage he turned to Charlie "Everything's going to be _perfect_. I promise."

--

"You have no idea how excited they are." Becky Roberts smiled at the two men. "Carl's been awake since six o'clock this morning, just waiting for you guys to come. And when Caroline woke up, she's been so bouncy. Seems she already knows she's gonna be home soon."

Charlie and Colby turned to each other, and sharing a mirrored smile whispered "Home."

"Here we are, they've been packed since Tuesday! Carl's been a very busy boy." She placed her hand on the knob, then turned to the men with a solemn look on her face "As excited as he is, he's nervous. You know he and Caroline came from a bad home. He rejected several homes who wanted to separate him and his little sister." She smiled sadly "He's really worried you won't like him. He kept asking me if I was sure you really wanted him."

Colby turned to Charlie and grinned "Looks like you two already have something in common.

Becky looked at Charlie and smiled, catching on to what Colby had meant. "Don't worry, Mr. Eppes. I've never seen those two smile like they do when you come to visit." Charlie nodded, a confident smile breaking across his face. Becky looked at the two men, smiled and turned the doorknob.

Charlie reached over and grabbed Colby's hand, who in turn gave it a reassuring squeeze. When the two stepped into Ms. Robert's office they both let out breaths neither knew they were holding.

"Caroline, Carl? Your daddys are here."


	2. Chapter2: The F Word, No Not THAT F Word

**The F Word…No Not THAT F Word **

**Summery:** Charlie gets a call from Carl and Caroline's principal that the two are in trouble.

--

Irritated that he had to cut his last class of the day 10 minutes short, Charlie Eppes was not in the mood for the pompous, snooty bitch of a principle that had called him to the school.

He slammed the door shut on his car and stomped up the steps and into the elementary school. He walked down the empty hallway and when he got the principles office he didn't even bother to knock, but just threw the door open in a very un-Charlie-like way.

"Mr. Eppes!" Mrs. Cook, the principle, jumped at his entrance.

Charlie didn't even look at her. His eyes fell immediately on his two children and all anger disappeared. The two looked up at him with such _broken_ looks on their faces. Carl's left eye was already a dark purple and swollen and Caroline's lower lip was swollen and still bleeding. Carl's blond, slightly long hair was pointing in all different directions. His yellow and black striped t-shirt was rumpled and his jeans had a tear in the left knee. Caroline's smooth, straight, black hair was pulled into a high ponytail had several strands hanging in her face that had fallen from the hairband. Her white t-shirt, which she wore under her green and blue checkered overalls, had grass stains on the sleeves.

"Daddy." She cried out, and ran to him, throwing her arms around him.

"Caroline." He whispered back, taking her hand he led her back to the seat and sat next to Carl, pulling Caroline up onto his lap. "Carl." He said, his tone indicating he wasn't angry with them…not yet, anyway. "Mrs. Cook," Charlie said turning to the annoyed looking woman. "what exactly happened?"

"You're kids attacked my son!" Came the cry of the woman next to him. Charlie turned, only now noticing her and her pudgy son. The boy had a swollen-shut right eye and cuts all over his arms, and a few on his face.

"That's not how it happened-!" Carl cried.

"Carl." Mrs. Cook cut him off. "Speak when spoken to." Charlie opened his mouth to snarl something at the woman but she spoke first. "Tim, why don't you tell us what happened."

"Well…" the pudgy boy started "I was just talking to Carl when he pushed me. So I hit him back in defense, but-"

"That's _not_ what-!"

"Mr. Eppes, please, control your children." Charlie _really_ wanted to throw something at her, but the only thing in his arms was his daughter, and he wasn't really willing to throw her. Hell, that bitch would probably sprout fangs and eat Caroline's head off if he did.

"You were just talking?" Charlie managed to ground out. Tim nodded, as his mother pet his head. "No offense, but I know my Carl wouldn't push someone for no reason."

"He called you and papa the F-Word." Carl whispered, not looking up from his lap and Charlie's eyes widened, immediately understanding.

"How dare you! My son would _never_ say-"

"Not that F-Word." Charlie cut her off. "He means 'fag'." As Tim's mother's eyes widened he turned to Carl, who had tears in his eyes. "It's ok, baby. Daddy's not mad at you." He said, reaching over and placing his hand on Carl's knee.

"Not mad at him? Mr. Eppes, your son beat up another student-"

"While protecting mine and my husband's honor. Look. Mrs. Cook, I know you have a problem with the fact I _have_ a husband, but if you can't pull your head out of your ass for five seconds and be objective about this I'll have to go speak with the board of directors." The woman's eyes widened "And now, may I ask why my seven year old daughter is here with a busted lip? This was a fight between two eleven year olds, wasn't it?"

"They were ganging up on him, Daddy! They ran away by the time Ms. Linda came, but there were five of them! They were hurting him real bad, so I ran over and hit Timmy in the face!" She leaned in and proudly whispered in Charlie's ear "_I_ gave him that black eye!" Charlie had to bite back a laugh.

"Ms. Caroline, if you talk out of turn one more time-"

"Mrs. Cook." Charlie snarled "First off, do _not_ talk to my children like that. _Second_ it doesn't sound like Tim was all that helpless." He lifted Caroline off his lap and stood, taking her hand. "Now, either punish my children or we'll be leaving." The woman's expression greatly resembled that of a deer caught in the headlights. "No? Well, good bye then." Holding each other his children's hands he exited the office, and as he left he could hear Tim's mother saying _'Timmy! Where on earth did you hear such a terrible word?!'_ There was hope for that woman yet.

The three were silent as they walked to the car. With the two buckled in the back seat Charlie got in the driver's seat and drove from the lot. They drove in silence for a while, when finally Carl's voice broke the silence.

"You…you're not gonna send us back, are you?"

Charlie nearly skidded the car off the road. "What??"

"You're not, are you?"

"Carl, why on earth would I want to send you to back to the orphanage??" Charlie asked, horrified that his son worried that. "You—you two are the light of my life! They would have to tear you from my arms if they wanted to take you away!" He looked in the rear-view mirror to see identical looks of relief on their faces. When they hit a red light Charlie spun around and look at the two "I don't want either of you to _ever_ think that your papa and I would _ever_ want to send you away? Got it?" Neither answered "Please, know we will _never_ send you away! Do you understand??"

They both looked up at him, tearful smiles on their faces.

"Okay, Daddy!"

"Yea, dad."

There was a honk behind them and Charlie spun around and drove forward under the now green light.

"Do…do we have to tell papa?"

Charlie smiled "No, we don't have to tell him…but what are we gonna say when he sees your faces?"

There was a pause, then Caroline let out an excited "We can say pirates attacked us!!"

Carl and Charlie laughed. "That's perfect, baby."


	3. Chapter 3: 2:30 On a Monday Afternoon

**Two Thirty on a Monday Afternoon**

**Summery**: Charlie and Colby get an odd phone call while at work.

--

"He's all yours now, Colb." Don said as he and Charlie walked up to Colby's desk.

"Oh, thank God! I thought I would spontaneously combust if I was Charlie-deprived for one more minute!" Colby said playfully as his coworker/half-brother rolled his eyes.

"Oh please, I'm sure you'll live." Despite his toughest efforts, Don still couldn't help but smile. "Besides, I needed him."

"I'm just _so_ wanted." Charlie said playfully, leaning against his husband's desk.

"You wish, Bud." Don snarked while playfully slapping his little brother's arm.

"Don't worry, Char. _I_ want you."

"Please, not in public." David called out as he walked past them.

Before either man could retaliate Colby's phone rang. Checking the ID he saw it was the house phone. He pressed speaker and looked up at Charlie, "Granger."

"It's two thirty on a Monday afternoon and I'm still in my pajamas. Do you know what that means?"

"That there's something mentally wrong with you?" Don answered

"It's officially summer!" Charlie and Colby exchanged fond glances, knowing exactly who it was. It was their fifteen-year-old daughter, Caroline.

"But when we left at 5:30 this morning you and your brother were wide awake and _fully clothed_." Colby laughed.

"Well, yea. Come sunrise we changed and went bed."

"That's not backwards at all." Charlie grinned at his husband.

"The sarcasm is unneeded, Dad."

"Where's your brother?" Colby intervened.

"Still asleep." She sounded almost proud.

"What? He's the older one, he should be setting an example for you!"

"Pssh! Yea right! Oh, right! There was a reason I called!"

"That's a first."

"Again, with the sarcasm."

"What is it, Car?"

"We're outta pizza rolls, could you pick some up on the way home?"

"That's why you called? What if we were on a life threatening, every-second-counts case?"

There was a pause "Are you?"

"No."

"Oh, well then it doesn't matter. Anyway, the pizza rolls?"

"Sure, we'll pick some up for you guys."

"Thanks!" and with that the line went dead.

Don was the first to start laughing. "_That's_ why I don't have any kids."

"_That's_ why I'm the favorite son." Charlie stuck out his tongue.

"When dad continuously begged us to get married, I don't think Colby is who he had in mind for you." Don laughed.

"Hey, at least I gave him _some_thing."

Colby laughed and stood "Well, I hate to break up the brotherly banter, but I do believe we have some pizza rolls to fetch." Taking Charlie's hand he led his husband out.

"What if I have some paperwork for you to do?" Don called.

"If you don't give me any paper work you can come over for some pizza rolls tonight." Charlie called over his shoulder.

Don thought about it for a moment, before finally calling back "…deal."


	4. Chapter 4: Mother's Day

Mother's Day

**Mother's Day**

**Summery**: Little 5-year-old Caroline celebrates mothers' day. Also: playful banter between adults!

--

"So if you look up at the map…all the red dots are possible next targets. But according to his pattern he won't strike until Wednesday." Charlie said, turning to the FBI agents all sitting behind him. He glanced at Amita who was nodding and looking expectantly at the agents as well.

"That's great, Chuck! Ok so that gives us five days to prepare. There's no way to narrow it down any more, is there?"

"Well, I can look deeper into his files to see if there's a pattern _within _the pattern…" He said, turning to Amita who was already typing on the laptop. He checked his watch and added, "But I gotta go pick the kids up from school, can you wait?"

"Yea, don't worry about it. Assuming he won't break from his pattern, we've got more time than we usually do. Besides, we got 'Mita here to help" Don said, nudging the girl, who rolled her eyes with a smile at the pet name Don had given her. Charlie nodded and grabbed his coat.

He made it to the door when Colby called "Hey hun! Remember Carl's spending the night with Kevin, so don't wait for him!"

Charlie stopped and clapped his hands together, pointing at his husband. "Thank you! You remember what happened the last time I forgot-"

"That's why I'm reminding you!" Colby laughed. Charlie made an over exaggerated face and blew a kiss at his husband, who in turn mirrored his look and pretended to catch the kiss.

"I'll be back!" Charlie said before rushing out the door, Colby watching him until he was out of sight.

"Aww, does Colby miss Charlie already?" Amita asked, a playful grin on her face.

"Pssh, you're just jealous I stole your man." Colby said with an equally playful grin and he spun his chair back to the table behind him.

"Oh please, Charlie's more obvious than Freddie Mercury." At that Don burst out laughing, nodding his head in agreement.

"He's not _that _obvious!"

"Oh Colby, you _know_ he's the woman of the relationship. I mean, _I_ knew he was gay before _he_ knew it." Don threw in. "The first thing I said when he came out was 'Finally!'"

"No! He's _very_ masculine. I mean he…we—I—shut up."

"Ooh, that totally changed my opinion. What an eye opener."

"Shut up, Megan, you weren't even in this argument!"

"He's got a point." David grinned at the female agent.

"Neither were you, David." Amita shot at the black man, a grin on her face.

"Back to the original topic-Freddie Mercury was _way_more obvious than Charlie is! I mean look at that mustache!" Colby pretended to gag.

"Charlie's got something like that goin' on."

"No, Charlie has scruff, that's totally different—and totally hotter." Colby added the last part as an afterthought. Both girls nodded in agreement.

"Ok, I do not need to hear my little brother being called hot."

"What? It's not like I described his in-bed tactics. Although, if you want-"

"Colby! I swear to God, you go any farther you'll be on desk duty for a year!" At that Colby shut his mouth, though the smirk was still there.

They all worked in silence for a while, talking only when they had a question for each other and what not. Then a young, energetic voice could be heard down the hallway and they all turned to look out the glass to see Charlie holding Caroline's hand.

"So _then_ Addy said she didn't like my bow, so then I told her I didn't like her dress and then she told me she didn't like my hair and I told her she was just jealous because her hair was really ugly. So we're not friends anymore. Then after recess me and Matilda were playing blocks when Jeff came and told us girls were stupid and we told him boys were gross and I threw a block at him and then we all built a castle together!" It didn't even seem like the young girl took a breath in that whole rant.

"Wow, was it a big castle?"

"Yea! _And_it was really pretty! It had a mote and everything! We even made Ken fall in the mote! But it was OK, because the alligators in it were vegetablearians so they didn't eat him!" The five in the room grinned as the young girl and her daddy walked into the room. "Hi papa!" At that she threw herself at Colby and hugged his legs.

"Hey pumpkin!" He greeted warmly, stroking her hair. He looked up at Charlie with a confused look. _Dad's golf game ran late, he couldn't watch her._Charlie mouthed to his husband, looking to Don to make sure it was OK. Don nodded with a smile, he always loved seeing his niece.

"Hi Uncle Donnie! Hi David!" She greeted the two men with an enthusiastic wave. Don smiled warmly at his niece he pet her head as she walked by. "Amita! Megan! I've got something for you!" She turned to Charlie who was holding her Power Ranger's backpack. He handed it to her and she began to dig around inside. She finally pulled out a green folder and opened it. Pulling out a red piece of folded construction paper and a purple one. She handed the red to Megan and the purple to Amita. "Happy mommy's day!" She cried excitedly, stunning everyone. Megan and Amita stared at the cards in shock.

"Mother's day?" The two women asked in unison.

"Yea…isn't…isn't it mommy's day?" She seemed to deflate a little.

"No…it _is_, sweetie." Megan said, "We're just surprised you made us cards, that's all."

Now it was Caroline's turn to be confused. "Why? I have two daddys…why can't I have two mommys?" She asked, turning to her father's with a confused look. Megan pressed her hand to her mouth as she looked at the cute card and Amita's eyes filled with tears.

"Oh, sweet heart." Amita said, putting the card down. "This is so nice!"

"Thank you so much honey!" Megan added and the two women pulled the little girl in for a hug at once.

Charlie leaned back against the table Colby was working at, "We have the sweetest little girl ever." He said quietly to his husband.

"Hands down." Colby agreed, taking his husbands hand.

--

OK, my grammar and spell check is being a total bitch and I'm not sure if it checked this properly. I re-read it a bunch of times, but if there are a bunch of mistakes that I missed (which could totally have happened) please tell me! I also apologize if some words seem to run together...fanfiction . net is being weird and when I ran it through a check on the site a lot of the words ran together as one. I think I got them all, but if I didn't I'm sorry! Anyway, please leave me something!

-claire


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